Some Things Only Seem Impossible!

By Janna Phelps

I hesitated in sharing this true story with you as it is very personal. Perhaps it will be just the thing to bring a smile to some forlorn face today!

Our oldest son got married in October and as I began to look for a dress, suitable for the mother of the groom, I quickly realized that there has been a change in fashion trends. Dressing up is not en vogue anymore. But, the Lord was so good and led me to a beautiful dress, at a deep discount! It was fun to watch the Lord provide my need! As beautiful as the dress was, it was a style that required a little…should we say…. help? It needed help in the foundation undergarment department. I believe the old fashioned term is "girdle."

Shopping for the foundational undergarment (girdle) was an adventure in itself! My husband of 25 years sent me over on my own to the “foundation” department (for which I was very thankful), and with fear and trepidation, I girded up the loins of my courage and entered the racks and displays that literally made my face turn red. "Please Lord, " I whispered in my heart, "don't let anyone I know see me in here!" I covertly found the item I was looking for, and tried to nonchalantly read the tag. A very bubbly, older saleslady came over and was a great help. We chose this odd looking...thing (remember the old corseted type of girdle...well they no longer look anything like that, my friends!) and she asked me if I wanted to try it on. I must have had a look of sheer terror on my face, and whispered fiercely, "No thank you!!!" I could just imagine me trying to put this scuba suit replica on in a public dressing room!! The noises that anyone would make as they struggled into this garment would warrant a call to 911! No. Thank You!!! I purchased the item as quickly as possible, asked for it to be double bagged (you can't be too careful you know) and fled the land of foundational undergarments!

The day of the wedding dawned and it was time for me to get dressed. I pulled the garment out of its double bagged hiding place, and my wonderful husband looked at me skeptically and asked, “Do you need any help?” That should have been my first clue. I smiled and said I could get it myself. After he left the room, I locked the door and so began one of the greatest adventures in my career as a female! I got the item up easily as far as my waist. "Piece of cake," I thought to myself with great satisfaction. The satisfaction died quickly as I began "stage 2" of my little adventure. No matter how hard I tried, I could not get the stretchy, tight material to budge. I stretched, and pulled and yanked, but to no avail. By now, I have begun to breathe hard. Maybe I should have let my husband help, but my pride took over as I could see him laughing hysterically at the picture I must make right now. No matter how hard I tried, it would go nowhere! So, I began to make noises like they do in sports, to encourage myself that I could do this. I even began to speak to myself in a low voice, "Come on Janna!" and "you can't let this thing beat you!" Nothing worked! So I figured I would try a law of physics...motion! I begin to jump up and down! My faithful dog, who was snoozing at the end of the bed, looked up in alarm as I bounded up and down, struggling to get the top half of this thing in place.

All of a sudden, I heard a knock at the bedroom door. It was our son Sam.  "Mom, are you OK?" he asked with concern in his voice. I stopped my jumping long enough to answer, "I'm fine, buddy!"

"Are you sure?" he asked. Oh, brother!

"I'm OK! I'll be out in a minute!" With relief I heard him walk away from the door. OK, my patience is at an end, and so prayerfully, with all of my strength, I pulled and the reluctant fabric slowly slid into place.

By now, I am breathing like I have just run a marathon and I am sweating!! After all this effort, this thing better make me look like a size five! I had to lay down on the bed for 5 minutes just to recover!

The wedding was lovely and now I have a daughter in law that I love and am very proud of! I have worn this piece of clothing since then, and have learned a few secrets to help the process along. The Lord has even used this to teach me a few things about life. First, what we do for others is worth it, even if it is a struggle. And God has a sense of humor that we can find even in the most mundane tasks! Life is already too hard to take such things too seriously. As I lay on the bed recovering from the struggle that day, a thought ran across my mind...and so I ask...does anyone have the number to Weight Watchers?